A few brief notes that we took that I'd like to share...perhaps other members can forward theirs to me or post comments:
- It's OK to model grief (to be sad in front of your friends)
- How you approach your children is specific to the child and their age and developmental level.
- Answer their questions, but don't elaborate. Only answer the question that is asked. When a child has the information he or she can process, he or she will stop asking questions.
- Expect regression (baby talk, bedwetting, thumb-sucking, wanting to be in bed with you), and it's OK to regress with them.
- Empower the kids, helping them to understand what it means to be safe.
- Identify people who help us to be safe (teachers, parents, police officers)
- Reflect back emotions -- ex. if your kids suddenly bite each other, say something like "you must be really angry to be biting, huh?"
- Validate their fears, validate their emotions
Project Enlightenment was mentioned as a good resource, as was Hospice.